Poly Notes Pt.5 - Enter The Kink

HOW KINK BECAME A CATALYST FOR DEEP HEALING AND TRANSFORMED MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MYSELF

[If you missed previous Poly Notes click here to read them]

I was born and raised in Barbados, and practically grew up in church. A very charismatic Christian church. The earliest messages I remember receiving about sex came from my pastor, not my parents, not my teachers, not my friends, not even television (it was the 70’s, we had one channel, my mother believed TV would rot my brain, I was lucky if I saw people kissing on that grainy screen). The gist, of course, was that sex was reserved for marriage between a man and a woman. Any feelings of arousal or any action from those feelings was a slap in the face of God, or more graphically, one of the flesh-ripping lashes that Jesus received as he was tortured before being nailed to the cross for my sins.

Can you imagine the emotional and psychological terror that it inflicted on a sexually awakening tween? Every spontaneous erection plunged me into guilt, shame, confusion, and hatred of my own body. When I inevitably, and naturally, star…